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November 12, 2010

CrAzY Bucket List.

feeling: Thank Goodness It is FRIDAY!

I was reading this blog and I came across the bloggers Bucket List, it made me laugh. Some of the things were pretty standard but most of it was pretty much outrageous. Thank goodness I am not the only one with a few unusual ideas.

This blogger inspired me to just put it all out there.

I want to list 100 CrAzY things that I want to do before I die.
Today I will start with 10, now remember they are CrAzy and maybe a bit of a fantasy but what life without a bit little bit of fun.

I will let you know if I actually get the guts or money to ever do what is on my bucket list.

My BUCKET list:

1. I want to CHOOSE my sons future wife - I am even considering an arranged marriage - I will teach him that it is how we do things in our family(It is our culture!)Bwahahahaha evil laugh!

2. I want to walk topless down the beach. Don't ask me why but I just want the confidence to do it.

3. I want to hire one of those metal detector thingies and go treasure hunting. I watched a program where people go looking for gold using a metal detector in the Australian Outback.I love the idea of hidden treasure.

4. I want to eat at a restaurant and then I want to choose a nice family/couple and anonymously pay for their entire meal but it must be a BIG meal.

5. I want to get a six packed stomach before I am 35, 6 years it should be doable shouldn't it?

6. I want to try truffles not the chocolates but the thingies that pigs find.

7. I want to one day dye my hair pitch black. This is the only colour I have not tried.

8. I want to just smash my car into someone else car/taxi when they are driving like an idiot (Have you ever watched Fried Green Tomatoes...LOOWAAAANDA!)I then want enough money to not care about the consequences.

9. I want to fire a really BIG gun. Not at someone, I am not that bad, just at a target.

10. I want to walk up to a random stranger, tell them how HOT they are looking and just walk away...I am married but I know how good I would feel if someone did this to me, so why not do it and make a HOT hehee strangers day?

Do any of you have Bucket Lists, is yours also strange, I would LOVE to hear what is on your lists?

Much Love M x

November 08, 2010

I love You the Way You Are.

Feeling: Miff!

A week ago I took Luke for a little outing...just him and I.
We went to I-play, it is a children's playground that has all sorts of goodies that kids love.
Luke is still a bit small for all the fun outside activities but he was quite content to sit on the play mat inside and bash all their toys.
He was also very interested in the other kids and played rather sweetly along side them. Little kids don't play with each other they play parallel to each other.

There were a few occasions where some older kids would steal his toy but he handled it all rather well and pulled his toy right back. Fortunately he is a big boy so has the strength to defend his territory. I did not have to intervene at all, I sat contently on a bean bag chair sipping my cool drink watching my baby play.

I- play costs R30.00 per child so most of the moms were quite glam. They were all dressed beautifully and were socialising with friends at the little restaurant while the I- play helpers kept an eye on their cherubs. Me, I could never allow that I do not feel comfortable with ANYONE else but my close family looking after Luke, something that I suspect will raise an eyebrow from other people but that is just me.

I had been at I - play for about 2 hours when suddenly this really pretty ohhh my goodness I WISH I looked/dressed like her...kinda mother cat walked in with her 2 little girls. Her older daughter was about 4 and the younger about 10 months. The mother plopped her gorgeous little girl down next to Luke and proceeded to boss all the I- play staff around. Get this, do this, can I have this blah blah blah. She then plonked her toned ass next to me and proceeded to tell me what a hectic morning she had had because they had already been to her older daughters school concert and still had two... not one... but two birthday parties to attend that very day.

* I can not understand people who attend multiple functions on one day, I am a say YES and commit to the 1st invite only kinda gal - I personally find it very rude to attend half a function and it grates my carrot when people cut my functions short to dash to the next.

Anyway she nattered on and on about what she was going to buy these kids and blah blah blah...I think I may have zoned out a few times. It was then that I decided that I had had enough, Luke was getting hungry so it was time to leave/escape.

As I picked up my happy boy she finally stopped talking about herself and said.. gee your son is white.

* Her daughter had dark brown hair, almost black/brown eyes and olive skin.

Yes he is, was my response, a real blue eyed boy.

She then said that I should put him in the sun so that he can get a tan.
I think I may have look at her a bit strangely at this point...a tan but my husband and I are blue eyed and have fair skins..ohhh and my son is only 11 MONTHS old!!

This did not stop her..yes, a tan... we took my baby to Sun City last weekend and she got this gorgeous tan from swimming all day.

It was at this point that I took a really good look at her little girl and yip there it was the signs of peeling on her very brown arms!

I then realised I just can not be one of "those" mothers and before I got rude I said my goodbyes and bolted out of the play center.

This is what I wanted to say to that mother:

"Are you fekking insane, have you not heard about SKIN CANCER? Are you actually advising me to tan my son? You are one stupid mother I hope you don't make your girls fit the "beautiful" mould ....lets hope your girls are never fat. I quiver to think about how you would handle that, what would you do then...diet pills?"

For once I actually kept my mouth shut because at the end of the day I love my cuddly, smooth skinned, white baby JUST THE WAY HE IS.

Much Love M xxx

October 28, 2010

It is Thursday NOT Wednesday!

Feeling: Blush - embarrassed!

This morning I posted the post Wordless Wednesday, it was a picture of Makoko scratching his Ass..giggle!

Anyway, I was looking at my diary and the date has just hit me right between the eyes...today is actually THURSDAY!
Somehow I have lost a day??

When I look back at the past month the days kinnda just blur into one....could it still be porridge brain from pregnancy, is it lack of a full nights sleep, is it my meds for the depression, is it that I have too much going on, is it that I need a holiday, is it that I am on the wrong side of 25 and have only 1 year left on the right side of 30...........All of the above me thinks.

Next I will be leaving Luke somewhere....to avoid this I think I may buy one of those harnesses to tie him to me until my brain function returns to normal.

*At this rate I may have to use the harness until Luke goes to High School...SIGH!

Much Love M x

Wordless Wednesday.

Me.... wordless never!

We went to the Johannesburg Zoo and look at what we saw Makoko The Silver Back Gorilla in all his glory...ever have an Itch that you just can't scratch? Must be a male thing.....


Much Love M x

October 27, 2010

Stand up and WALK!

Feeling: Weary

My patience has been rather thin with Luke this week, he is a few days shy of being 11 months old and is desperately trying to walk.

This is a fantastic milestone BUT he is very frustrated that he can't get it right and is still too nervous to just go for it.

Every time I put him down to crawl or play he ends up throwing a tantrum.

I thought they were only supposed to have brat attacks from the age of 2??

I am telling you Luke literally gives those Baby Bible Book the bird and does things his way and in his time. Great for him but not great for me.

I have no clue how to handle these situation in the correct way.

I pretend that I am in control but inside I am doubting my every move.

Luke wants to pull himself up on everything but is still very unstable so he often ends up falling backwards or forwards. He screams blue murder every time I catch him just before a spill. He does not want help...I can almost hear him saying...."Mamma I do self"!

He also WANTS to PUSH everything as well ... chairs, coffee tables, foot stools, his walking ring, if it can move he will push it.

He manages to move these objects around while tottering behind them. He happily does this with me holding his T- shirt at the back in case he falls (if you see my son in funny shaped, stretched out T- shirts this is why)

The problem comes in when he hits a wall, someones leg, a big table or a step and can't move the object that he is pushing...he tugs, pulls, puff and pants and when he can't get going again he throws another wobble!

Never mind that my back is now broken from bending over at a 90 degree angle while holding his T-shirt. He will moan until the object is moved from its 'stuck" position and he can happily carry on pushing it. This can carry on for more than an hour no jokes!

If we go shopping he does not want to sit in his pram ohh no King Luke want to push the pram......can you imagine an unstable 11 month old pushing his pram in a shopping center..do I really need to explain the problem!

As I put him in his pram he throws a brat attack. SIGH!

My angel child has been replaced by a very frustrated little boy who is trying so hard to communicate, walk and do things for himself but at this point he can't, so it is a daily battle.

Mom in one corner and Luke in another..... I have ignored the tantrums, distracted him and tried to "listen" to him as he is pretty clear about what he wants but it is hard and I often feel myself loosing it.

I am trying to breath and am looking at things from his perspective.

He is not being naughty (I don't think) but is frustrated.

This is all well and good but he can't get his own way all the time and I refuse to just give into him when I know he is going to hurt himself or someone else...So I will prevail even when strangers give me that "for the love of money and peace control you child" hairy eyeball.


Hmmmff if you can do a better job or have some handy advice by all means come and show me...as I confess I don't know what the heck I am doing, the books tell you how to deal with a 2 year olds tantrums but 11 months......???!


Much Love M x

October 26, 2010

Problem Solved by an 11 month old baby.

Feeling: TOLD

What can I say Luke is Still not sleeping through and is 11 months old!
In all honesty he has never slept through but I look at the bright side of life and think it is because he is a genius and that his brain is overactive.... or so I tell myself - I dare anyone to tell me any different! (Right eye is twitching).

A few days ago I heard Luke's cry at around 4am. With a huge amount of effort I pulled myself out of my warm, fuzzy, happy dream and rose from my bed. This took me a good couple of minutes.
By the time I got to Luke's room he was screaming, so I scooped him up and cuddled him....shoo shoo shooo its okay Mamma's here...(physically not mentally but whose checking).

It was like someone had switched a light he immediately stopped screaming and gave me a toothy grin.
Hmmmm manipulation me thinks?

I took him to the window and said look my baba it is dark outside.. DARK and you need to sleep.

He looks at me, frowns, points to the roof and says ight, IGHT! This is his version of LIGHT!

Hmmmm I got told......(listen you silly woman put the light on and it wont be dark - problem solved)

I think it is quite a compelling argument.

Much Love M x

October 20, 2010

Have you slapped a model today?

Feeling: VIOLENT!!!

I just READ this article and really, really wish that I hadn't.
It made me want to punch Gisele in her perfectly six packed stomach.
I WILL NEVER by her damn flip flops again, no matter how nice they may be.

What an arrogant, know it all, incredibly stupid shmodel!
She may be one of the most beautiful woman in the world but she is a bit of a plank. She should seriously stick to smiling and waving.

Don't you just love woman who have been mothers for a whole few minutes but already know everything. To make matters worse they have no problem handing out advice to other terrified, nervous OMW a baby just came out of me....what do I do now mothers.

Take a read:

Supermodel Gisele Bundchen: breastfeeding should be made law
The Brazilian supermodel Gisele Bundchen has said that mothers should be forced to breastfeed for the first six months of a baby's life.

Published: 2:42PM BST 02 Aug 2010

Gisele Bundchen believes mothers should breastfeed their babies for six months The catwalk star, who lives in the US, risked controversy by saying there should be a law preventing mothers from using formula milk.
The 30-year-old told Harper's Bazaar magazine: ''I think breastfeeding really helped (me keep my figure).

''Some people here (in the US) think they don't have to breastfeed, and I think 'Are you going to give chemical food to your child when they are so little?'
''I think there should be a worldwide law, in my opinion, that mothers should breastfeed their babies for six months.''
Her comments came after TV star
Denise Van Outen said she gave up breastfeeding her daughter Betsy after less than a month because she did not want photographers to take pictures.
''I probably should have persevered a bit longer than three weeks,'' she said last month. ''But I can't be sitting in Starbucks and breastfeeding, because they (photographers) are taking pictures.''
Bundchen, the world's highest-paid supermodel, had a natural birth at her home in Boston in December after meditating throughout her eight-hour labour.
Bundchen, who is married to
American football star Tom Brady, got up to make pancakes a day after her first child, son Benjamin Rein, was born and was modelling swimwear just six weeks later.
She said meditating every day prepared her for giving birth, telling Harper's Bazaar: ''It prepared me mentally and physically. It's called 'labour' not 'holiday' for a reason, and I knew that.
''You want to go into the most intense physical experience of your life unprepared? That doesn't make any sense to me.
''Then I was ready and I thought OK, let's get to work'. I wasn't expecting someone else to get the baby out of me.''


The one good thing that has come out of me reading the above is that I will try my best to not judge other mothers (I hang my head in shame as I to have been judgemental at times, fortunately most times I am to tired to care).

I want to try and support and encourage others not break them down. Being a mother is hard enough without dealing with OTM's. (Over The Top Mothers)

We and our children are all different and I truly believe that loving your child more than yourself will automatically make a great mother.

Breastfed fed Vs Bottle fed

Stay home moms Vs Working moms

Cloth Nappies Vs Disposable Nappies

Natural birth Vs Cesar

Drug free birth Vs Epidural

Cry it out Vs Rocking

Negotiation Vs Time out

Is this stuff really that important that it warrants such judgement?

Gee wizz it makes my mind boggle, if I look back to the day that I found out I was pregnant I think I have changed my mind about a million things a billion times.
Hahahaha nothing has gone strictly to my well thought out plans.
So for now I am going with my gut (winging it).

I will look after my family MY WAY and you look after yours YOUR WAY and we will get on just fine.

Much Love M x



October 14, 2010

I TOLD You So!

Feeling: Like the vastly Superior Partner.

I adore my hubby but at times I could slowly strangle him with a big grin on my face. Today is a perfect example of this. MEN strange creatures!

We have a maid (Supa Cleaner) that comes once a week to do a good house clean and all my ironing! She comes every Thursday and to be honest it is the highlight of my week.
I think I may actually love her, I mean really, really love her! There is nothing better then walking into a sparkly, clean shiny house after work knowing that I did not have to lift a finger to get it that way!

Any hoo.....I leave our house quite early every morning to drop off Luke and Shnookz at Nana's house. Supa Cleaner can't get to our house before I leave... public transport in Johannesburg is a running joke.

So I leave the front door security gate unlocked and front door key hidden for her, so that she can let herself in. Not exactly the safest plan but I do what I have to do :-)

Chris always leaves the house after me so EVERY Thursday I gently remind him not to lock the security gate so that my beloved maid can get into the house to do all the jobs that I detest!

Chris always responds to my "nagging" with ..... A SIGH..." I KNOW MANDS you DO NOT have to ALWAYS remind me"! He says this through gritted teeth...get the picture?

Today was no different, on my way out the door I gave Chris a quick peck and whispered "Don't forget the maid is coming, leave the sercuity gate op.....! He gives me this irritated grunt and says "I KNOW, I know"!!!!
So with a raised eyebrow, I leave it at that.

I get to my office and the phone rings...guess who is on the phone...come on just guess!
MY MAID..."Hello Mandy,the gate she is locked"!

Can you Feking believe it... after all my gently reminding and Chris's irritated I knows....he locked the gate!!

I am now livid and call him...."Chris do you know that the maid is standing outside our house because somehow the gate that you left open locked itself "....sarcastic I know but geeewizzz DUDE!

I I I I Diiiiid leave it oooopppp....he starts to argue rather hesitantly....hmm are you sure I ask?
"No" is his reply! I could almost hear him hang his head in shame!

So he had to leave work to go all the way to our house to let my poor rain soaked maid in...a 20 min drive both ways....A lesson learnt lets hope so.

I can't wait to go home tonight and say.....repeat after me...I will always listen to my wife and smile while doing it!!

Much Love M x