Where do I come from?

Feeling: Sentimental

I just read a friends blog - My Spirited Baby.

It is one of my favourite blogs!

She wrote a post asking if her two sons look like her at all and whether her boys look similar or different to each other.

She is in a cross cultural marriage, so her hubby's darker genes are stronger than her very fair genes but I can definitely see a lot of her in her beautiful caramel boys :-)

I hope she doesn't mind but I wanted to ask the same thing about my son.

My reason for asking this question is a bit different...my entire family are dark...they ALL have DARK brown hair and DARK brown eyes! I on the other hand have blond hair and blue eyes. So as you can well imagine I have been asked my entire life "where do you came from?"

It used to really make me terribly upset when I was younger because all I wanted to be was the same as them. I also got told...wow your brothers are SOOO good looking and dark where do you fit in......OUCH, not the best thing to hear when you are a awkward, fugly teenager!

I have however overcome the feeling of being "left" out by the way I look and I now celebrate the fact that I am different from the rest of my family (mom and dad included). It is still a topic that is ALWAYS discussed when people met the entire clan for the first time but I just laugh and smile because it makes people "wonder" where I came from hehee! (SCANDALOUS)

The fact that people tell me that my son and I look the same is something that I find really exciting and new. I get a thrill whenever people say "wow Mands he looks just like you!" It is something that I have never experienced and I must admit I just can't hear it enough.

What do you think?

The baby on the top is me (yes I was that cute ;-) and below it Luke.

Much Love M x

What Lies beneath the clothing?

Feeling: Honest

Every week I go onto a website called the Shape of a Mother (www.theshapeofamother.com).

It is a website where normal woman post pictures of their bodies before, during and after pregnancy - NO PHOTOSHOPPING allowed. It shows only the real deal!
Be warned most of the woman are naked, so don't go on it at work :-)

This website displays pictures and stories that are sent in by normal mothers. They don't look like Posh Spice or Heidi Klum after giving birth that is for sure. It very cleverly dispels the new mother size 0 myth in one foul swoop and that is why I like it.
Come to think of it, I actually don't know anyone who looks like these celebrities after giving birth ...do you?

The mothers who post their very personal pictures and stories have a bit of extra junk in the trunks, stretch marks, loose skin, saggy boobs, scars and poor body image.
They are brave, they show the world what they are hiding under their clothes after having children!
The good, the bad and the ugly side of post partum.

The Shape of a Mother gives normal woman a chance to express how hectic pregnancy is and that no matter who you are it changes not only your life but body as well.
It also shows that yes we love our kids but boy growing them alters ones body sometimes a little but most times a lot.
We don't have to be happy or accepting about the changes - battle scars, badges of honor but we are thankfully not alone!
Often mothers feel guilty that they are not happy with their post partum bodies, we love our kids but hate our bodies - SOUND familiar.

My personal opinion is that a lot of the post partum depression that new mothers suffer from is caused by unrealistic expectations which makes us feel sh1tty about ourselves and our less than perfect bodies after birth! Especially since the media splashes/ bombards us with images of celebrities practically walking out of the hospital after giving birth looking like they walked off the cover of Vogue!

I sure as hell didn't look or feel glamorous at all, squishy tummy, milk filled boobs, Caesar scar, granny panties holding in all my bit and bobs, ohhh and ping ponging hormones...YIP one yummy mummy right here..snigger!

When I feel pregnant I decided that I would not pick up a huge amount of weight. Trust me it was hard, I have never felt so hungry in all my life. Food became my first love. I had to control myself all the time. I made sure that I did not go overboard for the sake of going overboard (sadly it is a myth that we are eating for two). I monitored my own weight gain and made sure that I chose only healthy options. It was tough especially when those cravings attacked....but most times I was able to fend them off! Not every time but most times :-)

I gymed 3-4 times a week right up to the day before I gave birth (it is a myth that you can not do physical activity while pregnant). I did cardio, weight training and pilates but please note: I had a VERY easy pregnancy, I could do this without endangering myself or my son. It is not the same for every woman. High risk pregnancies or woman who get hectic morning sickness ect may not be capable or allowed to follow my rigorous routine. Ask your gyno first!

The Wednesday before I had my son, he was born on Sunday I had picked up 9.4kg's. When I left the hospital I had 3 kg's to loose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight. People now tell me that I look the same as I did before but I know the truth about what lies beneath!

The real deal is - I did not get away from the post pregnancy body even though I tried my damnedest. I am however pleased that I did the best I could.
Things have however changed and I am not happy about it.

My 36 week belly.

Here are my post birth issues:

1. I have a hernia in my belly button - it used to be an inny and it is now an outty! It pops out as soon as I eat or do stomach exercises. It look and feels really yukky.

2. I have a Caesar scar.

3.My waist is defiantly wider.

4. I have a bit of loose skin on my tummy and my tummy is no longer flat, it is kinnda rounded!

5. My boobs are gone - I had a boob job a few years back (A cup to D cup). They are now a small C and are only implants. If I had not had the implants I would have had nothing left and would now look like a dude.Thank goodness for them!

I would love too hear from you moms.
How has your body changed after pregnancy?
How do you feel about your battle scars/ badges of honor?

I do hope that this post will encourage anyone who is going to have a baby - you can keep the weight gain under control.

I hope that anyone who is feeling horrible, sad or just plain grossed out by their post partum body will realise that you are not alone...I am standing here right beside you.
I have my good and bad days as well!

Know one gets away scott free, I hope that by sharing how my body is less than perfect that you will feel a bit better about yours

Much Love M x

Waiting For Bribery and Corruption.

Feeling : Even my toes are tired!

Last night was a disaster. I started sleep training with King Luke - snigger!
Lets just say after last night I have suspended sleep training indefinitely due to the lack of interest presented by both parties. Ohh and did I mention this mother is a woes?

Even our doggy Shnookz was distressed by the entire ordeal. She also refused to sleep in her bed last night. So I had one unhappy baby and one whiny, whingey doggy both wanting my attention. Needless to say who needs to buy tickets to the zoo, just come and visit the Hall residence, it is free entertainment! I would hate to know what the neighbours think!

I got home and did all the bedtime routine stuff (as per the "Baby Bible") and Supper Nanny (Side note: I love her!) When my son started to rub his gorgeous blue now red rimmed eyes, it was time for bed, 19:00.
I took him to his cot, lay him down, kissed his little head and whispered good night my darling. I left his night light on and tiptoed out the room. It all seemed really sweet and fairytale like up to this point!

As I gently closed his bedroom door, he arched his back, kicked off his blankets and let loose. He began to ScReAm and ScReaM and SCReam.......... and so this continued for 30 minutes. (Side note: My hubby and I are noisy umm loud people so my son has a VERY big voice as well).

Wanting to make sure that he was okay I sneaked my head around the door only to discover he had vomited ALL OVER - the smell hit me right between the eyes. Curdled milk and night time porridge! He seems to be like a snake...when threatened he regurgitates his food..Good times!
His sheet was covered, the mattress was covered, the blanket was covered, his baby grow was covered, his teddy was covered and yip KL was covered.

So there I was stripping his cot thinking SCREW this! While trying to get his pukey baby grow off him without getting any on me. All I kept saying was I hate you Baby Bible and Supper STUPID Nanny...wanna see YOU try this!
I think my right eye was twitching and I had a pain in my jaw from clenching my teeth!

I then put my sobbing, red, splotching baby in the bath. After his second bath of the evening I wrapped him in a towel and gave his a weary cuddle,by this stage he was FULLY awake and all smiley. King Luke 1 - Mommy ohh who is keeping score anyway?
He kept giving me this naughty grin (he screws his nose and shows me his teeth) I tried not to smile but I did!

I have realised I am not the strong willed, totally in control.... my child will never do that kind of mother that I thought I would be! One night of sleep training (Okay mommy training - Luke is gifted) and I give up!

I am now waiting in anticipation for the day when I can bribe my child to do what I want him to do -PARENT OF THE YEAR right here me thinks!

Much Love M x

Don't poke me...I don't like it!

Feeling: Proud.

My son is just over 9 months old so it is vaccination time again. Today I had to bundled him into the car for his measles vaccination. SIGH!

I usually dislike (hate) taking him for these vaccines...it is true what they say "this is going to hurt me more than you my child"!
My heart literally aches as I watch my innocent, unsuspecting, happy, content baby gurgling away while the nurse prepares the injections. He has no clue what is going to happen and the worst part is that I can't explain to him that mamma has to allow this to happen as it is for his own good!

He gets the injections in his thighs...I say injections because there is always more than one. As the needle goes into his chubby thigh, he gets a surprised expression on his face and then the screaming and tears start. It is a dreadful sound, it is not that tantrum scream it is an OUCHIE cry! All mommies will know the difference, an ouchie cry is heartbreaking to see and hear.

Anyway today I walked into the clinic with my happy boy who flirted and smiled with everyone. He was being his usual charming self and was handing out big toothy grins to anyone watching him.

The clinic sister picked him up for a love and cuddle before doing the yukky deed...luring him into a false sense of security! NAH not really.... she was actually a really lovely lady who you could see adores babies.

I held Luke while the first needle went into his thigh...to my astonishment he did not even blink....second needle goes in... he yelps turns around and gives the nurse a filthy look and then swipes her hand away.... She smiles and walks to the other side of the room to her desk to fill out his booklet. He now totally aware of what she is all about twists his entire body around so that he can follow her every move.

Until the time we left her rooms he would not be distracted and would not take his eyes off her. By this stage were were all hysterical with laughter.

He was keeping his beady eyes on this wiley woman! Once bitten twice shy King Luke?

Much Love M